Somewhere Along the Beach
by JackFiction
Summary: Robin is caught staring at Starfire's grepnaks  whatever those are , right before they head off to the beach. This is their dialogue.


Author's Note: Man, I'm just cranking out these dialogue one-shots. Obviously this one had to be about Robin and Starfire.

Summary: Robin is caught staring at Starfire's grepnaks, whatever those are, right before they head off to the beach. This is their dialogue.

Disclaimer: The Teen Titans belong to DC Comics. I love them.

…

"Robin? Are you alright? You have been staring at my grepnaks for two minutes."

"Wha-? No Star, I wasn't… I mean, I might have been, but I didn't mean to…"

"You are still staring; is there something wrong with them?"

"No. Nuh-uh. Nope. There's nothing wrong wi- please stop poking them."

"Are you sure you are well, Robin? Perhaps we should not be going to the beach."

"No, no I'm fine. Fine, I'm fine. We definitely should be going to the beach; we promised to meet the others there, right?"

"Correct! And I am excited to see them; Beast Boy seemed most eager to be going!"

"Haha, 'eager' sure is the right word for it. I can't believe he got Raven to wear a swim suit. "

"Raven is wearing a swim suit?"

"Yeah, a bikini at that. He pranked her; well, not really 'pranked' so much as 'stole all of her clothes' this morning. It was really funny too, until she got mad and stuffed us in the fridge. Me included 'cause I was laughing."

"Stealing clothing does not seem quite so amusing."

"Well, in retrospect, I suppose it was really immature and not that funny, especially not after an hour of having Beast Boy's cold foot shoved against your face and chicken bones up your-"

"But, Raven wore the swim suit anyway?"

"Yup. She still couldn't find her clothes and Beast Boy promised to obey her every command for the next week."

"Oh, that does not appear to be so bad."

"This is Raven we're talking about. I'd rather gnaw off my own foot than make that kind of deal with her. Her mind can be one scary place."

"So, do you still have a telepathic connection with our friend?"

"Yeah. I'd prefer not to have one, though. She can read me like a book now and always complains about my dreams."

"Why is that?"

"Er… Well… I'm a guy, so I often dream about, um… stuff."

"Stuff?"

"Yeah, stuff. Like, man stuff."

"…Man stuff…?"

"…Okay! Look at the time, Star! Half past the freckle and all that! Haha…ha…"

"Oh, yes, we must leave! I fear our running is now late!"

…

75 minutes later. At the beach.

"Mind if I join you?"

"Robin! Yes, of course!"

"So, how do you like the beach?"

"It is glorious! I had no idea sand could be this warm, and the salty water is so refreshing. How has your time at the beach been thus far?"

"Great. It's great."

"You do not sound too great. Robin? What is wrong? …Why are you looking at those boys so strangely?"

"I'm trying to burn holes through their skulls. Here, wrap these around yourself."

"Robin? You are giving me three towels."

"Yes I am. Be sure to cover your grepnaks. It's a, um, game. You play it at the beach. It's called, uh, 'Wrap-up.'"

"A game? Are there rules to this game?"

"Yeah, rules. Um, rules are to show the least amount of skin as possible."

"…But, nobody else appears to be playing this game."

"No, no, that's not true. See, look at Beast Boy; he's burying himself in the sand. And, uh, over there too, that old lady is covering her head with a shawl. And-and see… I'm playing too."

"…Robin, you look ridiculous. I realize I am not from this planet, but I have learned enough to know that covering yourself in various food items is not normal behavior."

"What are you talking about? Earthlings do this kind of stuff all the time. Pass me that pack of hot dog buns, will you?"

"Um, Robin, I am sorry… but I do not feel like playing this 'Wrap-Up' game with you. Here are your buns."

"Wait! Star! I didn't mean-… Ugh, smooth shooting there, Robin."

….

2 hours later

"Hello Robin… I wish to apologize for my rudeness earlier this afternoon; I will play this 'Wrap-Up' game with you now, if you wish."

"Oh, uh, it's alright, Star. You don't have to apologize… or play 'Wrap-Up' with me. I was just being stupid before."

"But you seemed so enthusiastic about playing. I have even brought tissue paper and pizza boxes. You are certain you do not wish to play?"

"Thanks, Star, but nobody's here anymore. There's no point."

"Oh… I see… You created this game to prevent others from observing my grepnaks, correct?"

"…No…"

"You are lying."

"Those guys were leering at you. Like wolves."

"Perhaps, but they were not the only ones."

"Star, I never-"

"Robin, did you not notice the number of people watching you? They too seemed… hungry."

"But girls won't try to make a move on me."

"Some of them were male."

"…Huh?"

"Oh, yes. Most were strapping men…"

"…I'm feeling disturbed."

"With tattoos all throughout their bodies…"

"Really disturbed."

"And hair covering their entire-"

"Alright! Haha… No need for details, Star."

"I was merely stating the facts."

"Yeah, thanks for the heads up… I'll tread carefully during the next prison patrol."

"That would be wise."

"Yup…"

"…Robin, you are staring at my grepnaks again. Are you positive there is nothing wrong with them? Perhaps I should have one of our other friends- Oh! There is Beast Boy!"

"Wha-? Star? No, wait!"

"Beast Boy, you have shown up at the most perfect time. Could you please check on this for me?"

" Beast Boy, don't you dare! I will personally kick you off this team if you-"

…

Epilogue-ish part:

Starfire did get Beast Boy to check her grepnaks. After a few minutes, he concluded that they were just fine.

Robin never officially kicked Beast Boy off the team, but the next combat practice was a hellish one. Beast Boy was sure his arm was never intended to bend quite like that.

Raven kept the bikini. It really brought out her eyes. She kept true to her word and bossed Beast Boy around for the next week. The tower had never been so quiet before.

Cyborg was asked out by four women at the beach. It was a slow day for him.

Thanks for reading! Comments are open to everyone.


End file.
